May 23, 2008

Woo Hoo!

I won again. Thanks, Rodney.

Posted by Charles Austin at 10:34 AM | Comments (1)

September 08, 2007

Caption Contest

He's got the whole whirl in his hands...

Has Al Gore been putting on weight? Well, let me put it like this, the mass of Al's pinkie has surpassed the threshold necessary to become a black hole.

whirl.jpg

Image copied from here.

Enter your own if you like in the comment section.

Posted by Charles Austin at 01:17 PM | Comments (3)

December 12, 2006

Woo Hoo!

I won again!

Posted by Charles Austin at 07:42 PM | Comments (0)

November 27, 2006

Woo Hoo!

I won again!

Posted by Charles Austin at 10:06 PM | Comments (0)

June 28, 2006

If Only I Were Running Caption Contests

bella.jpg

Presenter Danny Glover, left, kisses Harry Belafonte backstage after Belafonte received the BET humanitarian award during the 6th annual BET Awards on Tuesday, June 27, 2006, in Los Angeles. (AP Photo/Danny Moloshok)

putin.jpg

Putin kisses boy's stomach.

Posted by Charles Austin at 06:34 PM | Comments (0)

May 19, 2006

We Have a Winner for These Losers

Two good entries, but the best for this:

3amigos.JPG

Was Jon's: "Yeah, we can't seem to do that Vulcan greeting thingy with our hands either."

Salut!

Posted by Charles Austin at 06:27 PM | Comments (0)

May 09, 2006

John Conyers Practices His Impeachment Hearings

Either that or they spontaneously burst into a version of Day-O by Harry Belafonte as though possessed by Beetlejuice:

3amigos.JPG

This picture was snapped mere moments before the Three Amigos finish their song with a flourish and a pelvic thrust. Surely you can think of a caption before I close the contest and declare a winner sometime next week.

(h/t to Lawrence for the pretty picture which first appeared here.)

Posted by Charles Austin at 08:41 PM | Comments (2)

April 30, 2006

"Kobe, I'm Open"

Title in honor of this weeks winning entry for:

ikea.jpg

A Chinese man rests as his colleague works at being the mascot to the newly completed IKEA Siyuanqiao store in Beijing, China, Monday, April 10, 2006. IKEA on Monday unveiled its new outlet in Beijing that will be its biggest in Asia, a seven-story, US$100 million behemoth that the Swedish furniture maker hopes will put it ahead in China's thriving but crowded market. (AP Photo/Ng Han Guan)

Mr. Right: Gee, the Lakers bench is looking mighty thin this year...

The quantity was low but the quality was high for the entries this fortnight.

Posted by Charles Austin at 11:40 AM | Comments (1)

April 17, 2006

"Thriving, But Crowded Market"

Is that supposed to be funny? Somebody come up with a better caption to this:

ikea.jpg

A Chinese man rests as his colleague works at being the mascot to the newly completed IKEA Siyuanqiao store in Beijing, China, Monday, April 10, 2006. IKEA on Monday unveiled its new outlet in Beijing that will be its biggest in Asia, a seven-story, US$100 million behemoth that the Swedish furniture maker hopes will put it ahead in China's thriving but crowded market. (AP Photo/Ng Han Guan)

This will have to tide you over until I get back next week to pick a winner.

Posted by Charles Austin at 10:44 PM | Comments (5)

SQNPCC #8

Not to put too fine a point on it, I'm heading out to Pinehurst for the rest of the week, so I better hurry up and tell you who won.

unapaloma.jpg

Iranian artists perform as they hold up samples of enriched uranium after Iran said on Tuesday it had produced low-grade enriched uranium, in Mashad, April 11, 2006. (Stringer/Reuters)

Jon takes the yellowcake this time with: "Glory be to the Bomb, and to the Holy Fallout. As it was in the beginning, is now, and ever shall be. World without end. Amen."

Lot's of good entries this week. Thanks to everyone who participated. Now, if only Rodney had played a little fast and loose with the free word association and pushed the They Might Be Giants theme just a little farther...(I'm your only friend, I'm not your only friend, but I'm your little glowing friend, but, really, I'm not actually your friend, but I am...)... things might have come out differently. Oh well, that's a plame, uh, I mean, um, shame.

Oh, by the way, in other news, Woo Hoo! I won again!

Posted by Charles Austin at 10:21 PM | Comments (1)

April 11, 2006

Una Paloma Ummah

Or, I still don't get performance art. It's time for another Caption Contest (#8).

unapaloma.jpg

Iranian artists perform as they hold up samples of enriched uranium after Iran said on Tuesday it had produced low-grade enriched uranium, in Mashad, April 11, 2006. (Stringer/Reuters)

Contest will last until I declare a winner.

Posted by Charles Austin at 04:03 PM | Comments (15)

April 07, 2006

SQNPCC #7

I can see clearly now, jihad is gone. All of the bad feelings have disappeared -- we have a winner!

3d.jpg

Mr. Right: The ever-vigilant paparazzi afford us a rare glimpse of Michael Jackson out for a stroll near his new children's petting zoo in Bahrain.

Perhaps I should add another item to my list of ever-changing, ever-growing, yet curiously non-binding caption contest judging criteria, to wit, that any legitimate, timely reference to the movie Three Kings featuring a variant of, "What is the problem with Michael Jackson?" has a pretty good chance of winning in any given week.

Sorry for the delayed judging, work had me on the road...

Posted by Charles Austin at 06:15 PM | Comments (0)

March 30, 2006

Hey, I Can See Right Through Their Thobes

It's time for another Caption Contest (#7).

3d.jpg

A veiled Jordanian woman uses a special filter to view a partial eclipse of the sun in the Jordanian capital of Amman March 29, 2006. (Ali Jarekji/Reuters)

Contest will last until Tuesday.

Posted by Charles Austin at 07:46 PM | Comments (7)

SQNPCC #6

Apparently, the secret to minimizing my work in judging caption contest entries is to pick a difficult picture and immediately bury the post under about 28 inches of blog.

grasshopper.jpg

McGeehee, in a nod to the great vaudeville acts of yore came in with the best caption, the worst caption, the mean caption, the median caption and the mode caption, i.e., the only caption:

"Ah, Grasshopper -- you have been breaking bricks and rocks with your bare hands since before you could walk. Surely you can do this as well?"

"Master, I don't mind you calling me Grasshopper, but please don't call me Shirley."

Dosvidanya, my Georgian friend!

Posted by Charles Austin at 04:15 PM | Comments (0)

March 22, 2006

Zen and the Art of Crumbling Empire Maintenance

After a few weeks hiatus, it's time for another Caption Contest (#6).

grasshopper.jpg

Go ahead, give Pootie-Poot your worst.

DOWNDATE: Is it just me or does Putin remind anyone else of Dave Foley's succubus on The Kids in the Hall?

Posted by Charles Austin at 09:50 PM | Comments (1)

February 27, 2006

Woo Hoo!

I won again, sort of.

Posted by Charles Austin at 11:12 PM | Comments (0)

.. Five Ringy Dingy

Rodney knows what's on Monkeyboy's phone: (thinking) "Now that I've got Paris Hiltons phone list I've got it made."

ballmer.jpg

Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer during a conference at 3GSM World Congress in Barcelona, February 14, 2006. REUTERS/Albert Gea

Thanks to all who contributed this week. Keep up the good work, but don't get too carried away with my earlier caption contest criteria. As for me, I'm tired, still have a few hours work left tonight and I got to catch a plane at 7:00 AM. The SQNCC will take a one week hiatus while I am away. And so I'm off to Palm Springs and San Diego for 7 days. See y'all next week.

Posted by Charles Austin at 09:27 PM | Comments (1)

February 23, 2006

Woo Hoo!

I won again!

Don't forget to leave your own Monkeyboy text message below.

Posted by Charles Austin at 09:17 PM | Comments (0)

February 20, 2006

SQNCC #5

What's the text message on Steve Ballmer's phone that has him smiling?

ballmer.jpg

Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer during a conference at 3GSM World Congress in Barcelona, February 14, 2006. REUTERS/Albert Gea

Posted by Charles Austin at 08:02 PM | Comments (8)

SQNCC #4 Is In the Can

In honor of the Winter Olympics, I have selected Gold, Silver and Bronze winners winners this week.

Field Marshall Earl Kitchener Hussein says:

Kitchener.jpg

Gold -- Kevin Murphy (and Sgt. Fluffy): "You want the truth? You want the truth? You can't handle the truth!"

Silver -- Lynxx Pherrett: "Our destination is the planet Sha Ka Ree, which lies beyond the Great Barrier at the center of the galaxy."

Bronze -- Rodney: "I pay a dollah for that!"

I'd like to thank everyone that entered and especially those that mention this humble contest in their vastly more frequently visited blogs. Note to Rodney: generally speaking, brevity remains the soul of wit, but sometimes a great notion requires a few more words. In my undocumented, unpublished, unaccountable, and yet, highly variable scoring system, wit offers the highest degree of difficulty and therefore scores the most points, but pop culture references (the more obscure the better, but not so obscure that I don't get them), double entendres, triple entendres, show tunes, criticism of the NCAA, and flattering remarks give you the best chance to stand on the podium. And since the scoring results are multiplied rather than added to come up with a final score, the more tricks you can pack into your twizzle without falling down, the better. Oh, and cash bribes work well too.

Posted by Charles Austin at 07:51 PM | Comments (3)

February 13, 2006

We Have a Grinner

SQNCC #3 is over:

clint.jpg

Some good entries this week, but I'm going with the shortest entry because it made me laugh the most:

Matt: "Take my wife.., PLEASE!!!"

Thanks to everyone who entered. Now go and make Lord Kitchener proud.

Posted by Charles Austin at 08:59 PM | Comments (1)

SQNCC #4

Field Marshall Earl Kitchener Hussein says:

Kitchener.jpg

Caption contest results next Monday. You still have a few hours to get in a caption of Bill and Hillary Clinton (and George and Laura Bush) yukking it up at Coretta Scott King's funeral.

This contest is closed.

Posted by Charles Austin at 12:49 PM | Comments (12)

February 12, 2006

Apres Moi le Deluge

One more day to join in the fun!

Posted by Charles Austin at 11:45 AM | Comments (0)

February 07, 2006

SQNCC #3

We all know funerals are for laughing and scoring partisan points:

clint.jpg

Former Pres. Bill Clinton addresses those gathered at the Coretta Scott King funeral ceremony at the New Birth Missionary Baptist Church in Lithonia, Ga. Tuesday, Feb. 7, 2006. With Clinton, is his wife, US Sen. Hillary Clinton, D-NY. At rear is Pres. Bush and First Lady Laura Bush. (AP Photo/Ric Feld, Pool)

So do your worst. Winner announced next Monday.

Rest in peace, Mrs. King. The hope that you can be reunited with Dr. King is enough to make me wish there really is a heaven.

DOWNDATE: If only I'd seen the Saddam Shark sooner.

Posted by Charles Austin at 08:02 PM | Comments (10)

February 06, 2006

SQNCC #2 Final

We have another winner!

saddam.jpg

(AP Photo/Karim kadim)

Rodney Dill: Rumor has it that Saddam's defense attorney's have been coaching their key witnesses.

Of course, having only one entry made it an easy decision this week. I didn't think this would be that hard (Ed. Why do you assume people are reading?). Look up for a new contest.

When life gives you lemons make lemonade. By getting two entries this week I will increase the participation by 100%. Always, always aim high! Hmm..., I wonder what picking a cartoon might do for my sitemeter... ?

Posted by Charles Austin at 07:22 PM | Comments (2)

January 30, 2006

SQNCC #2

Sharpen your #2 wits and have at it:

saddam.jpg

(AP Photo/Karim kadim)

Winner announced next Monday.

Rejected Images for this week's contest:

sludge.jpg un casket.jpg float.jpg

(AP Photo/HO, USGS) ... (AP Photo/Wandera W'Ouma) ... (Rick Wilking/Reuters)

Posted by Charles Austin at 04:28 PM | Comments (1)

SQNCC #1

End in a tie...

down boy.jpg

Rodney Dill: I could've been president, I would've had the election in my pocket, if I just could've found my pants at the time.

Mr. Right: Ted Kennedy attempts to prove wrong all those who would dare to say that he doesn't know squat!

And a Special Musical Award Winner for Maggie:

You can walk like a duck, swim like a duck
Do just like ducks do
Quack like a duck, flap like a duck
Paste feathers all over you
You might smell like a duck, waddle in muck
Aní leave behind a lot'ta ducky-doo
But if you ainít a genuine duck
FOLKS JUST MIGHT NOT
GIVE A DUCK 'BOUT YOU.

Posted by Charles Austin at 04:03 PM | Comments (2)