July 07, 2004

One Heartbeat Away From the Presidency

With apologies to Bobby Goldsboro (and what a strange thing that is to have to write!):

There he sits exploiting torts with a legal pad,
What a handsome lad, that's my boy.
I pull his string, he says, “Bush is bad!”,
”The economy’s sad!”, that's my boy.
You can have your Cheney and his gravitas,
And you can have your Hewitt and Limbaugh,
I'll stay here with my Little John near, Air America on the radio,
Biding my time and watching Johnny grow.

Making his fortune, he’s a sly young fox
Before a witness box, That's my boy,
”Mickey Mouse jury -- it's thirteen o'clock”,
He can sell any crock! That's my boy.

In six short years he’s gone from rich to richer,
And what he did before that I don't know,
Little John cried during nappy time, while I’m the war hero,
Shrum and Cahill chose watching Johnny grow.

Complex, young and sexy’s what Big Media said,
Well coiffed head, that's my boy.
Better bone up quickly, keep his briefings read,
Or our tickets dead, that’s my boy.

What’d you say Teresa, the country boy’s got hick charm,
The pollsters say he’ll be good for a hundred votes or so.
We’ll keep talkin’ shop ‘til the fop’s ball’s drop, flip a flop before I go,
Me and God watching Johnny grow.

Me and God watching Johnny grow.

Posted by Charles Austin at July 7, 2004 06:05 PM

Very clever.
You hit the nail on the head!

Posted by: fred at 09:06 AM

Speaking of Air America, I heard the following on NPR this morning. When Bush was asked to compare the 2004 VP candidates, Bush said "Cheney can be President". Short and to the point. NPR then aired a clip of Kerry's response. [quote from memory] "Cheney can be President. And from day one of this adminstration he has been running the show. And that's what we have to change."

Puh-leez, can we keep the wacko conspiracy theories out of the presidential campaign? It's one thing for a media guy like a radio host to say something like this. It's another for a presidential candidate to say it.

Posted by: Jon at 10:22 AM

With apologies to Brian Wilson:

Wouldn't it be nice if we were Frencher
Then we wouldn't have to liberate
And wouldn't it be nice to raise the taxes
In the kind of world we'd regulate

You know its gonna make it that much better
When we can say goodnight and stay together

Wouldn't it be nice if we could wake up
In the morning when the day is new
And after having spent the day with dumb reporters
Hold each other close the whole stump through

Happy times together we've been spending
I wish that every poll was neverending
Wouldn't it be nice

Maybe if we think and wish and hope and pray it might come true
Baby then there wouldn't be a single thing we couldn't do
We could be elected
And then Bush would be rejected

Wouldn't it be nice

You know it seems the more we talk about it
It only makes it worse to live without it
But lets talk about it
Wouldn't it be nice

Posted by: Dawn W at 10:29 PM