Where would Bobby Mugabe be allowed to show his face in polite society? Bobby Mugabe's in the house!
President Robert Mugabe's anti-British diatribes rose to new extremes yesterday when he declared that Britain was using the internet to destroy Zimbabwe and recolonise the Third World.
Yea, if anybody's going to destroy Zimbabwe, it's going to be Bobby Mugabe, damnit!
Many delegates at the summit in Geneva hailed a new era of free access to information. But Mr Mugabe saw the internet as pernicious.
In other words, not completely controllable by Bobby Mugabe and his rent-a-thugs.
"Beneath the rhetoric of free press and transparency is the iniquity of hegemony," he said.
Oooo, hegemony.
He controls all broadcasting in his country and in September closed the Daily News, the only independent daily newspaper.
Apparently, Bobby Mugabe only likes hegemony if it's his.
He said information technology was dominated "by a few countries in the selfish interests of those countries which are in quest of global dominance and hegemony".
Maybe "hegemony" is Bobby Mugabe's word of the day. Eight more uses and it will be his.
He singled out Britain, the United States and Australia for using their information technology superiority to "challenge our sovereignty through hostile and malicious broadcasts calculated to foment instability and destroy the state through divisions".
Who said irony is dead?
Mr Mugabe told the conference that the internet and computer revolution were "spin-offs of the same industry that allows once again for the conquest of our societies . . . the same platforms used for high-tech espionage".
The same platforms used for education, medicine, agriculture, and prosecuting war criminals and others guilty of crimes against humanity.
New technology provides one of the few channels of information still open to his opponents.
Those must be the hegemonists Bobby Mugabe is tlaking about. With that or those who can only hope and pray for a liberation of Zimbabwe from Bobby Mugabe.
During the failed referendum campaign to approve a new constitution enlarging his powers in February 2000, critics distributed a highly effective mobile phone text message declaring: "No Fuel. No Jobs. Vote No."
Yea, baby!
The opposition Movement for Democratic Change and Zimbabwean human rights groups have made extensive use of e-mail.
And the UN wants to take over the Internet so Bobby Mugabe and his compadres can rid themselves of such pesky interference. Not on our watch.
What a sad, sick joke the UN is.